Monday, October 12, 2009

Unloved in the blogosphere...

I am not loved! I swear, with all the 0 comments, a girl feels so alone!

But seriously. I've been fighting tooth and nail with myself to get back into the kitchen to make some bread, some muffins, some freakin' biscuits in a can for heaven's sake, but I just can't muster up the energy to do more than the requisite meals. In my house, this means a protein and a starch. Possibly a veggie or a fruit if it can be sliced and served. If it can be microwaved, it is Beloved. The idea of committing to a yeasted anything makes my back groan and my brain shut down with a firm, "Hell. No." Even quick breads and muffins give me pause because they must be baked immediately, and if the measuring and mixing tires me out, I don't have much choice but to put it in the oven. Which doesn't seem like much work, but when the hour for that bread to cook means I have to keep my eyeballs open and my ears tuned for the timer, all I suddenly want to do is sleep.

I am seriously considering cookies. My pregnant and weight losing self can afford the calories, and even I can manage to finish measuring and mixing before I get tired. I think... Shut up! Pregnancy and I don't mix. It kicks my lily white ass to the curb and laughs while it does so. The worst that happens is I freeze the crap to bake another day. But if I'm honest with myself, I don't want cookies. I know! Pregnant lady not wanting cookies. Crazy. I want some fucking cheesecake and I will happily kill someone to get it. I just don't have the energy or the patience, let's be honest to make one. And do you know how much that shit costs? Walmart -- WALMART, PEOPLE! -- sells a 9-inch cheesecake for $11. I can make a 9-inch cheesecake for $5, maybe $7 if I don't get my cream cheese on sale.

Split the difference and you've got a nearly 50% markup. That's highway goddamn robbery, people. It's wrong, and something must be done. Like maybe, one of my Good Internet Buddies volunteering to come over and make me some? Please? I will beg for cheesecake. Shamelessly, people. Take advantage of this weakness, just for god's sake GET THE PREGNANT WOMAN SOME CHEESECAKE!


Frieda said...

Love your blog, ergo, love you <3

In the meantime, make the box mix stuff....I sometimes don't even wait to bake it...nothing like yellow cake mix I'm hungry~

12gViolet said...

Yay! I am loved! (And you know I love you too, Frieda. With the tastiest looking berries taunting me from your home page... Wanna FedEx me some of those?)

And you know, brownie mix DOES taste awfully good when licked directly from the spatula. There's something sinfully delicious about scooping up batter with a big ol' silicone spatula. Yum.